Baby Smiles and Momma Trials

Today started out with my first real smiles from little Rowan. What a blessing to receive this morning :-) She is five weeks now and more alert and looking around at her surroundings. I just love watching her.

Above is a picture of my hubby, Dan, and Rowan. I have a picture of him with each of our children in this general pose and I just love it :-) We didn't get it right away but I am so thankful I did with Rowan as well. There is just something special about him gazing down at his newest blessing.

Although my day began sweetly, I soon found myself sinning horribly with my attitude. Everything was getting to me. School started late, Liam was interrupting a lot during our reading time for Bible and History, the girls were bickering and Rowan was crying. It would be an understatement to say I was frustrated.

I lost my cool and not only in the morning, but in the afternoon as well! Sigh....I had to apologize twice to my children for my sinful response. When I raise my voice or respond sharply...I feel so bad. It is no wonder my children respond so :-( It is so hard to be Christlike each day...and yet I know I must try to show the example for my littles.

I am struggling right now with much stress and exhaustion. We are dealing with disrespectful attitudes and disobedience from the elder set and my little man is struggling with night terrors. Unfortunately, all this is causing me to respond badly and I am praying for God's strength and help...I sooooo need it!

I must say though, that my children's laughter and smiles(like Liam above), kisses and hugs snap me back and also give me a good reason to keep pressing on and trying to become the woman/wife/mother God would have me be. That is the joy I need to remember when I am frustrated and overwhelmed.

I sit here now, writing this post, greatly desiring to be a good mother and having less of the irritable attitude I find myself struggling with. I look at the face of my newest little one(isn't she so very darling?) and feel a great weight and responsibility. I feel that I do not want to look back and only see sorrow or bitterness. I don't want my children to see that either. I want them to look back on their childhood and see more joy and affection, more love and gentleness.

Lord I pray that you fill me with a right heart! Give me gentleness and joy. Make me the mother you would have me be! I know that with you Lord, I can change...but I can not do it myself! Lift me up Lord and work in me!

Thank you for listening(if you got this far) to my crying out and if you feel led please pray for me.

Blessings,
Sommer

Thoughts For Mother's Day

"When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world."
~John 16:21

This verse above is so very true for me. I have given birth to four children and each delivery has been fraught with anxiety and recovery has been uncomfortable. My first was even accompanied with long labor and then a c-section! But, how can you stay sorrowful when you look upon the face of your child? Each time my babe has been brought over to me, the sorrow, anxiety and fears have vanished and been replaced by utter joy. What a treasure each child has been!

"A mother is a chalice, the vessel without which no human being has ever been born. She is created to be a life-bearer, cooperating with her husband and with God in the making of a child. What a solemn responsibility. What an unspeakable privilege~a vessel divinely prepared for the Master's use."
~Elisabeth Elliot

"My mother was the source from which I derived the guiding principles of my life."
~John Wesley

"I remember my mother's prayers, and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all of my life."
~Abraham Lincoln

Though, today, my Mom and I may differ on some points of theology, she was a huge source for the thoughts and beliefs I have today. She was daily in my life...praying, loving and talking of God to me. I do not recall a day that she did not pray for me before I headed to school or when I went to bed at night. I felt so much security knowing she brought me to the Lord in this way.

She taught me early that every aspect of my life should be viewed through the Word of God. Though she wasn't perfect she was the best Mom I could have had and I am so thankful today to call her my friend!

I often doubt my own abilities as a mom and I know there are changes that need to be made. But even if I am not doing it "right" all the time, I do know that the Lord has called me to this vocation. I know that I must rely on Him and cry out to Him when I feel a failure, knowing that He will equip me with all I need.

On this day we honor mothers, I remember my own and I pray that my children will think on me with as much love and affection as I do my own mother when they are grown.

May each of you mom's have a very blessed Mother's Day!

Blessings,
Sommer

Calling of Mother

I read a lovely post today that really hit home for me right now. Kelly wrote something that reminds me I'm not alone and what my calling is. I hope you'll read it and be encouraged to embrace the calling God has given to you and to not despair.

In the glow of baby sweetness, life still is real. Amidst my haze of love filled feelings, recovery and adjustment, I can still hear the bickering of children, the sound of disrespect coming from a dear child and disobedience that seems to be more obvious right now. I have felt inadequate and we have had to admit to ourselves our inconsistencies have played a part in this present difficulty. But, in all that, God has a grand plan that I can not fully see. However, I know that I and my hubby have a duty to raise up our children to love and fear Him, and to hopefully be His Children!

This post reminds me of my high calling and that I must always call on God..because in my own strength I am powerless, but in Him, nothing is beyond His power!

I hope this encourages you as it did me :-)

Blessings,
Sommer

Great Family Fun Idea!

Yesterday, I popped over to a fast-growing-to-be-one-of-my-favorite blogs and found myself once again encouraged to try something new with my family. I highly recommend reading soulemama's post .

I'm not an artist by any stretch of the imagination, but I wish I could draw better. This Family Draw idea is great....and I'm sure the kids would enjoy it :-) And who knows, I just might improve my skills if I take the time and effort!

Hope you enjoy! And let me know if you have any other ideas for "family fun"!

Blessings,
Sommer

What's In a Name?

When Dan and I were thinking up names for our daughter, we went straight to our handy baby name books. As you all may have noticed, we've kind of stuck to a theme...we tend to be drawn to Irish, Gaelic names. Can't seem to help ourselves ;-P I've got a smidgen of Irish in me...so that is my excuse...or maybe it is just the way the names sound.

In any case, I was thrilled when Dan agreed to the name Rowan Meara ...I've always loved the name Rowan and now I have my own little sweetie with the name :-)

The meanings for Rowan in the book we used are pretty general: English~"a red-berried tree" or Irish~"little red-headed girl". Meara means "mirthful" in Irish Gaelic according to the book. So far...Rowan is not red-headed...but it could happen :-)

One thing I hadn't done was actually see a Rowan tree. So recently I went on the web and looked up some images and info about them.

Apparently they are best known in Europe for their red berries, but in China there are white varieties...rather interesting.

Here is a link talking about the Rowan tree. On one site I found out that unfortunately this tree is also cherished by the wiccans, but I still like the name and still enjoy the beauty of the tree.

Isn't this one below lovely with all its red berries? Not to mention the rushing water :-)

I hope you enjoyed this little post. When we name our children we always try to find ones with lovely meanings. This isn't always easy, but we try. I especially love the meaning of Meara. I hope my little girl will always be mirthful...full of joy!

Today, Rowan is three weeks old and she is a beauty and a darling little one. She has surely stolen all of our hearts!

Blessings,
Sommer